Confessions

In the time between the years that I hung out with B in high school and the years she was my roomie, B lived in Toronto. She rented a room in a house, just a 15 minute bike ride from my apartment, with three complete strangers - a couple and a single gal.  At first, she got along well with all of her roommates, but as time went on, the woman in the couple became more and more of a bitch disagreeable and went out of her way to make B's life miserable.  We called this woman, "The Presenter", because every time our friend Andrei was over at B's place, The Presenter would find some excuse to bend over a piece of furniture to display her goods in a simian fashion; presenting them, if you will.

Among the many rules that The Presenter's had for the house, one of her idiosyncrasies was that she didn't want B to use her Starbucks mug.  Now I understand that people aren't always comfortable sharing their things, but instead of saying that, she told B that the Starbucks mug had sentimental value. 

Is she kidding? Sentimental value for a Starbucks mug?

We were a bit floored. Who could possibly feel sentimental about the merchandising of an evil corporate conglomerate like Starbucks?  And thus begins my confession...

Dear B:

I hate to tell you this, but I think it's better if you hear it from me. I betrayed you. I have attached sentimental value to a Starbucks mug. I know it's irrational and that I'm letting our twenty-year old selves down, but I love this mug. When I look at it, I can feel the warmth of the California sun cover my skin like warm honey and I feel like I'm at home. For this indiscretion, I apologize and I swear I am not like The Presenter in any other way. When you come to visit, I promise to let you sip your rich and delicious caffeine nectar from its depths, in hopes that you too can feel the same joy I get from this piece of ceramic.

I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

Love,

Al

PS: Although it may appear from the Orange County Starbucks mug in my cupboard that I have begun a collection, I assure you that is not the case. I feel nothing for that other mug - it's Costin's.  Though, if I came across the elusive Balboa Park Starbucks mug that I saw on my first trip to San Diego, I would have to buy it. But I stress, I am not collecting Starbucks mugs. I can stop any time I want.

Comments

[lisa]

the presenter!! omg I almost peed my pants laughing.

[Stevie]

I just bought the same mug when I was in San Francisco! I love it.

[Stevie]

Actually to be totally honest, I purchased both a San Francisco mug featuring the Golden Gate bridge AND the California mug. Then I thought about buying the Toronto one. I see what you did there, Starbucks.

[B]

Dear A,

I forgive you. It's not your fault. The allure of Starbucks can only be measured in ceramics.

My only regret about The Presenter is that I did not follow through with my initial plan to steal the Presenter's magical Starbucks mug and smash it into a million pieces before moving out.

However, I am sure that I in the short 8 months I lived in that hole, I managed to make thier lives hell. And, if I didn't, I am sure the memory of Andrei .... yadda yadda yadda ... will live on with them forever =P

Love, B

P.S. I like the mug. And hope to sip from it joyously in the near future.